My Cove of Love...

I have moved

2007-10-18T09:21:00.000+08:00

Dear friends, family and mostly students...
I have moved to lovecove.multiply.com
My apologies to my anxious student fans *wink*...hehe

I need life...

2007-03-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

Sigh...what a way to start a blog entry. But that's how life has been. Or rather, what life? Dunman is sapping my life. sounds pathetic huh. Maybe its not that bad. i'm just exaggerating. you know me. :P
Tried to get into my friendster account after years of not going in. had to get new e-mail and all and the stupid thing just won't verify my e-mail add no matter how i try in various ways. So i couldn't reply any of those msgs. To Ayul and Diana, my cuzins, if you happen to stumble upon my blog, wanted to say i loved what u did to ur friendster pg. spoke of volumes of love.aww...cldn't reply ur msg. but am real happy to c how happy u guys are with your 2 lil princes. :)
coming to my 6th mth soon. baby dearest was real amusing just now. Was watching my indian dance kids rehearsing for SYF with the Indian music blasting and all. & suddenly he was so super active, kicking away like nobody's business. bet he was doing his own indian dance in there. With my inclination for prata with lots of curry, mummy's lil one better come out looking like some Hindustan hero okay? hehe.
Past has come back to haunt me and adina if i may add. thought i saw my past from the back at Vivo city a few days back. Didn't dare look back to verify. Just walked past. Didn't tell hubby either. didn't want him to get unnecessarily upset.
Don't know why but pregnancy makes me feel insecure. No matter how much hubby dearest reassures me with his love, ther's those moments when he has to be out at work late or go for those night jobs, those moments when old fears and insecurities start haunting me again. Today is one of those moments. I hate my past for having inflicted that onto me. but like what sunshine junior said, the past will not hurt you unless u allow it to by raking it up again. besides, i have 'past' to thank for making me the woman i am today.
I may have your daughter, but other than the trickling red substance, you are just a name to her because she already has a real father.
On a brighter note, susnhine jnr has been a devoted santarina sending me those love filled notes on a weekly affair. thank you my dear. those notes may be lil but they mean a lot to me :)
SYF begins next week. The pressure to produce for all 4 groups is mounting. :( n what i fear most is my modern dance. in short, i don't feel too hopeful looking at the way things are progressing. :( Setting of mid-yr papers is soon due. that means vetting for all the el and lit papers for sec1-3 will be coming in too. that's apart from the marking and the lessons missed coz of SYF. :(
God,give me strength to undertake these challenges to the utmost of my ability for without You, i am nothing.
Ok...a depressing entry signing off on a depressing note.

Blessed

2007-01-09T12:56:00.000+08:00

You know what i realise about blogging? It makes me reflect on life and most often than not, i recall all the wonderful things i have been blessed with in life. Praises be to Him. :)
Yesterday morning, i had a noce surprise to start off the week. In my mailbox in the office were 4 nomination forms for 'the most caring teacher award' which was conducted last year. And God bless those angelic devils (such an oxymoron!) but there, on their paper was their little tribute to me and their nomination for me to receive the award. It came from Ru Lan, Nozhat, Qhairil and someone i didn't quite expect to actually do this kind of stuff, Louis Zhang Feng Yan. :) I suddenly realise how all those littlex2 things i did for them and all those littlex2 times when i took 5 or 10 mins of my time to spend with them,either consoling or advising, all those times have not been left unnoticed. Of course I can't run away from the emotional attachment that have grown through seeing them grow,( not so much academically but as individuals with a heart) but feeling all warm and loved inside makes it all worthwhile.And although its obvious i did not get anywhere near winning the award, like i said, its all worthwhile.

A few days back, auntie junior sunshine alicia send me an sms about how she would still want to study literature and how it has taught her some valuable life lessons. I used to tell my fellow Lit colleagues, its different loving Literature and conveying that same love to the students. But at that time i read Alicia's message, I felt that my mission had been accomplished. Even if i had managed to spread the love for lit to just one student, she will continue to propogate this love to many others. Sure makes me feel darn good. hehe. :)

'Teach-touch lives'. That saying used to be a cliche which i would just plainly mentally discard but having gone only 4 years down the teaching road, I can sincerely say, the fulfillment you get from knowing that you have touched lives and made a difference, it beats all the cliches. I can hear them a thousand times and see them flashed across the tv set countless times, but i can truly say its no cliche' to be plainly brushed aside anymore. Thanks for the 'how are you doing' messages and the congratulatory messages Anwar, Nurul Syaz & of course Auntie Alicia. & thanks for remembering me Shiffa and even dreaming of me, Melati. & Angel who stopped by to see how i was doing. :)

Back at home, hubby dearest has been my 'elves and the shoemaker', doing all the household chores while i sleep and voila! I wake up to nicely folded laundry and mopped floors and even breakfsat in bed. hehe. I so love this guy. And poor him, he has been suffering from worse nausea cases than me.hehe.They call it the sympathy syndrome and this supposed sympathy syndrome has seen him all giddy and running to the toilet to vomit when he wakes up. hehe. Though it doesn't happen all the time (maybe 2 or 3 times a week) but its hilarious and i don't know why, but it makes me feel loved and all good. hehe. But of course, it comes with a downside. And thats the role reversal- when i have to do the massaging and all. hehe. but I don't mind. I so love this ex-boyfriend of mine. :)

And of course, how can i forget the love of my life, Adina who has been ever so thoughful to ask me to rest almost eveytime she sees me tired. :)

Dear God, thank you for everything.
I may not have riches but You have given me so much more than that.
Segala puji bagi mu Ya Allah...

news update!

2006-12-21T20:39:00.000+08:00

Blinkx2...yup...reality check. school hols are almost over. sobx2. been trying to update my blog a few times already but have lost the entry at least twice and it just fizzled my blogging mood out.
well..right now, i'm in the fish tycoon fever thanks to hubby dearest. As a compensation for not allowing him to bring his big bulky fish tanks over to our new place, I allowed him to buy this fish tycoon game online and u know i spend ridiculous hours (yup, i got addicted too) breeding fishes and selling them. right now, i'm not a tycoon yet but as i blog, my fishes are growing. hehe. :)
got the class postings yeaterday. tough load next year but i console myself with the fact that i'll be around only till mid july. yea! that's coz adina's gonna be a sis and baby dearest is due somewhere around my birthday! :) hope its a boy this time. and adina's been forcing me to taste all the nice food she is tasting coz she insist that her lil bro/sis gets to taste it too. hehe. :)
wonder how my 5b-ians and my lit-ians from 5a are doing... guess it will be a whole new start to loving a whole new class next year. actually, not that new coz i've taught some of them already before. well...february's gonna come soon and so will the results. i just hope my kids do well. both my 5b and 5a. and dat auntie sunshine alicia who's been working her butts off for christmas gifts.kinda miss those people... :(
orites then...tomorrow is check up day and dis lil one is a bit more fussy than his sis. been causing me breathlessness and stuff. we'll see how he's doing tomorrow in the ultrasound. n no, my tummy is not yet at bulging state but pregnancy does give you a universally recognized reason to get fat. hehe...not that i intend to though. just in case.. *wink*

Mummy Farah signing off....

I'm married part 2

2006-09-11T16:10:00.000+08:00

Ok, i'm back. I'm now at the adapting stage of marriage life again. With all the marking coming in, it's dejavu when it comes to moments where you have to tear yourself away from your hubby n daughter. Adina has been in high spirits and much more well-behaved since we became a complete family, and she, having a permanent father-figure in her life.There was once when i had those lil tiffs with An and I asked Adina if she wants to have a new papa. Her reply reminded me of just one of the many reasons why I chose him: I only want Papa An. :)
I love the moments when we get to pray together as a family with my husband (husband? hehe..new vocab.. :P)leading me and Adina, hopefully all the way to jannah too.
Mama & Abah has been extra happy too and it makes me happy to see that. I guess they are relieved to see me safely married and happy.
On the down side, An's family is going thru a trying period without him around anymore. My mum-in-law is rather depressed an cries almost everyday or at the thought of him. His sis and even his niece and nephews too. We spent last weekend sleeping there and his sisters observed a remarkable change in his mum who was so much more happy and lively.As a mother,I can feel her pain too especially when An is the one who helps her with chores and marketing. The one who will automatically give his mum or dad a massage complete with the oils and all when they feel tired, pamper them with his cooking, tease, tickle and bite his sister as a show of affection, goofing around everybody etc etc. He's basically the life in that house. And now, Adina and myself have been blessed with his presence in our lives. Alhamdullillah.
If my feelings can be summed up with a song, it would be the very song i deddicated to my husband by Shania Twain, the one that was played during the cake cutting ceremony. The words beutifully capture everything I feel for my best friend, my companion, my partner in life and hereafter, my husband...

I just swear that I'll aways be there.
I'd give anything and everything and I will always care.
Through weakness and strength, happiness and sorrow,
for better or worse, I will love you with
every beat of my heart.)
From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on

From this moment I have been blessed
I live only for your happiness
And for your love I'd give my last breath
From this moment on

I give my hand to you with all my heart
Can't wait to live my life with you, can't wait to start
You and I will never be apart
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment on

You're the reason I believe in love
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above
All we need is just the two of us
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment
I will love you as long as I live
From this moment on

Those who have been waiting for some pics, here they are but not too many though. My blog is getting overloaded i think.

I've met the man I want to spend my life with...

My Family

Dunia & Akhirat...

Dressed in my first costume on 1/9...waiting for my prince

Hindi movie star material..hehe.. :P

After standing guard to ensure that the glamour queen title for the night will not be snatched away by those minahx2 perasan glam (lagix2 yang pakai baju merah ngan si tudong hitam tu), i can safely say, i am satisfied. hehe.

anyway, you can check out more pics at this link :

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8AaNGLJo5atWF4

I'm married!

2006-09-06T16:23:00.000+08:00

6 September 2006. I can't believe i'm married. Alhamdullillah. Praises to Him. Everything went well. Me and my dearest hubby are now happily having our honeymoon at Central Beach Resort, a 5 star resort in Krabi. Having our tea time break at the club lounge then we're back to our room withj the private jacuzzi to get ready to go to Ao Nang to shop and have seafood dinner. Our stay has been pleasant and we are so much in love. Insyaallah,it will stay this way or get even better all the way till jannah.
Thanks to all who came for our wedding. for my dear students who came all the way despite the distance, love u guys. I love the gifts too. :) will update with pics when i come back to singapore. My lil angel is also having her lil holiday at her kak chik'c place, my 9 yr old cuz's house. She was crying for a while when she saw us off at the airport but she was okay after dat. miss her so much. ok, gtg enjoy my pastries and the specially made ice coffee.hubby waiting... :)

p.s: Can't believe i'm married.

A tribute to my father

2006-06-18T01:24:00.000+08:00

Hey...been long on a blog holiday. just felt a spur of writing in con junction with father's day today. So here it is. A tribute to my father...

My Abah has always been a man of few words. Since young, I've always seen him as the disciplinarian or an 'indicator of intolerable behaviour' coz mama was always the one whose anger was, and still is, often expressed through her two most well used weapons: a sharp tongue and a gift of spewing a continuous flow of words; something which I think may have been passed down to me through all the verbal sparring 'sessions' we had. Abah on the other hand was the 'silent killer'. He was often the cool and patient one. But much like Vesuvius whose eruption buried the city of Pompeii, my siblings and I were very well aware that once Abah has voiced out something, we're probably in deep trouble.

I remember once when I was in primary school and our family rented a chalet during one of the school holidays and 'Vesuvius' erupted. I have often been the more rebellious one among my siblings and one who sometimes doesn’t think twice before voicing out my thoughts. My siblings and I were glued in front of the tv set watching a Chinese drama serial and refused to budge despite the frequent calls from mama to eat dinner. I guess Abah reached the peak of his patience and 'summoned' us to have dinner but the 'smart' me who didn't spot the danger signs even managed to retort some unhappy snide remarks which 'earned' me a big tight slap across my face. Since then, I only recall being hit one other time when Abah saw a photo taken of me with a boyfriend but these two incidents left me lasting impressions and memories of my disciplinarian father; one which has evolved to tender feelings of appreciation and understanding as I now recall those incidents in retrospect and view them not with the eyes of a rebellious teen but that of a daughter and a mother.

My Abah is a pious man who loves going off to remote places around the region with my granduncle in search for some 'makams' or some wise old habib somewhere. When he goes off for these week long trips, which we have grown used to, his absence is minimally felt. However, several years back, I had a dream. In it, I dreamt that Abah passed away and the sense of loss was so permeating that I woke up with fresh tears trickling down my already wet cheeks. In fact, for several days after, I still felt the lingering sense of sadness even though Abah was still physically present, well and healthy in front of my very eyes. I guess even though Abah has usually played a more 'behind-the-scenes' role in bringing us up and stepping in when situation starts to get out of hand, he has always been a quiet but very significant figure in my life.

Another incident which I can never forget was the day of my nikah during my first marriage. It was obvious Abah knew all along that he wasn’t the one for me. Yet none of his words nor my mum's could counter my strong headedness. Though Abah consented to be my wali on that fateful day, the tears he shed when he hugged me before the photo-taking spoke of the tears of a defeated father; one who may have felt that he had failed in his duty yet with great magnanimity prayed sincerely for my well-being. Those tears that fell heavily down with love, wrenched my heart but there was no way I could say it.

Ever since I was a toddler learning to walk and literally needed help to get up when I fell, till now when I am 26 and face even greater stumbles in life and still need help to get on my two feet again, it's always been Abah and Mama who offered their hand to get me up again. My Abah is not one who is expressive with his feelings but through all the times when I more than disappointed him and mama yet both never shunned their help when I needed them, through all the countless times when I never heeded his advice yet he was there to offer his assistance when I got myself in a mess, for all these 26 years till now when his duties as a father has technically been relinquished, I don't need those three words to be spoken out loud. I know his actions speak time and again of the sincere and heavily laden love of a father.

And for this great man, I only have the utmost love and respect. May Allah bless you always.

Happy Fathers' Day Abah.

Happy Birthday!

2006-04-01T12:59:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday my blog construction worker! :)

p.s: Nope, this isn't an april fool's joke. :P

Life is a facade

2006-03-28T22:09:00.000+08:00

Been down mentally, emotionally (which in turn affects the physical) for two days. Though two days is still not enough to be up and running, i guess i have to do what i do best: put on a facade and get on with life with whatever strength thats left to keep me going. Coz hey, my parents didn't name me farhana which means happiness, for nothing. If i can't be truly happy, at least i'm good at pretending i am.

Sometimes i don't understand why there are such black hearted people in this world who just can't stand to see others happy. If they keep those feelings to themselves, maybe its not so bad. But when they resort to doing things to make life difficult for the other, that's when I just refuse to comprehend. It's ironic that in such modern times, there are still people who resort to back-dated and 'kuno' means which is just jijik and hina, to get their hearts' content. But my faith is strong. God is great and there is no other greater power than His. So go to your bomoh, go to your dukun, go to the devil, go to the jins...just go to hell. We'll fight you and your stupid syaitan with our faith and love. We're not going down that easy. Sesungguhnya doa orang yang teraniaya itu dimakbulkan Tuhan. It's gonna be your turn to vomit blood now. Just you watch and see...

Just another news update: My 1 year old orange gen2 was in an accident again for the 3rd time on friday 24 March.

Just too much of a coincidence.

Like I said, whoever you are, its your turn to vomit blood soon ...

Thank you extreme makeover-blog edition!

2006-03-15T23:47:00.000+08:00

see my revamped blog? Finally, my teaching career has paid off to something! haha...kidding...thanks to my dearx2 student and part-time blog contractor, shiffa aziha, my blog finally has a different look. it's more finished and complete than the first one in fact. n this first blog entry for the new blog is deddicated to her...thank you dear! mmmuuacks! (hmm...though i'm also left to question if there isn't enough homework...hmm....)

Football wif my gals

2006-02-01T21:26:00.000+08:00

Wow... Sure was an exhausting day but I was still all smiles despite walking home with aching feet and perseavearing on with my heels. Guess what I did today?
I played soccer barefooted at the school field wif my dear students. Of course,when I came in to play, it was with hope that by some miracle I could help to at least close-up the disparaging gap of 8-1 to 5A's favour. Yah..Ms Farah to the rescue! And she did come to the rescue but for the wrong team. Hahaha!
Unfortunately, this Ms Farah, in her bid to be fair (or so she hopes to believe) coz even though she was the form teacher of 5B, she was also the lit teacher of 5A,had scored an own goal against her class. So there I was all red like a lobster in my all black attire soaking in the rays of the merciless sun,running around like some sports-deprived kid with my pants folded up trying hard to defend the merciless attacks and fantastic dribbling on Marisher's part,feeling like the unsuccessful Beckham. Hahaha! Bottom line is, I had fun. (and surprisingly I'm feeling minimal guilt)

Yah maybe there are days when i wake up and ask myself when will this mad cycle ever end. Right Shiffa?
But what you guys may not know is, as much as Adina is my reason for living, you guys are reason enough for me to stay in this profession. :)

p.s: Congrats 5A for the excellant fight! 5B, my dear girls, you guys rock. Still fighting on despite the bleak situation. I stand here now proudly as your form teacher for I can fully say that you have fulfilled our class's motto: Learn to live, Live to Love. And you guys are a bunch so full of love for life, you never fail to bring a smile to my now sun-burnt face. :)
Live on, Love on my dear students...

welcome 2006. bye 2005

2006-01-01T14:55:00.000+08:00

Brand new year so i thought after being dormant for so long,maybe its time i say something. hmm... school reopens in 2 days time. I'm far from being enthusiastic about tis opening especially when 3/4 of my holidays were spent doing work and going back to school. New classes to teach..new challenges to face and added responsibilites to fulfil...sigh...

On a brighter note, my dear students made me proud for n lvl. first time in Dunman history, there was a 100% pass n all of them moved on to sec 5. 4H- you all deserve it and I'm very proud of each and everyone of you all.If that wasn't sweet enough, d lit results shocked me and my students(n mrs neo!). 71% distinction and out of this 71%, 54% scored a1s d rest a2s. wow..talk about a real fluke. but alhamdullillah, praises be to Him. I'm just happy that my efforts for those kids did not go to waste. 4G: You all never fail to surprise me. :p

well..how did i celebrate new yr? nothing much. no foam parties or anything of that nature. but i did have a nice lil night picnic on 30 December at Sentosa's hilltop with chilli crab, rambutans,durians, drinks & ben & jerry's ice-cream to savour. best of all, it was amongst the company of my loved ones- fiance', daughter, my good friends and their hubbies-to-be. and with our full tummies, at 1230 am,we headed down to sentosa'spahlawan beach where adina played with her sandcastle toys and we waddled in the waters and the sleepy ones were 'whale-beaching' on the mats. Had some fun being a kid and getting wet in those rolled up pair of jeans.headed home around 2 and was sure dead beat.But I'll do that again, anytime.

gonna spend the next day psyching myself up to face the kids and the work at school. sigh....will it ever end?

syawal 2005

2005-11-15T17:08:00.000+08:00

wow..time sure flies...holidays are here. Ramadhan was here but has passed. Syawal is going off soon. Had a nice Ramadhan though feeling regretful that i didn't go for terawih as often.But my outing with 4h and fadilah 2 geylang to break fast was a memorable one. Sure enjoyed myself playing fire crackers and hearing my dear students, Khairul and Q sing. It was a fire cracking playing cum singing practice session for Khairul who made us proud the day after by becoming Dunman's 2nd idol. it was fun planning for the 'flower presentation' stuff n all. n it warmed my heart to see how united the class has become. :)

A week ago, around 34 of them came over for hari raya visiting. Yup i was definitely overwhelmed and the hour before they arrived, i can assure u, i was performing even better than iron chefs u see on tv as i fought with time to serve them their pots of mee and nuggets. hehe. by the tym they arrived, i wus looking half dead and exhausted. n unfortunately this year, due to my poor economic state, duit raya had to be reduced to 1/3 of the previous years. hehe...so those of you planning to serbu my house with hope of adding a significant amount to your collection raya, you may want to consider diverting your route to more profitable areas. hehe :P
but i have to say, i was pleased looking at how well my students behaved and how some of the guys automatically asked to tumpang solat asar. i think they are part of the dwindling community of guys who take prayers seriously. kudos to their parents. i think they are doing a good job parenting. Care to go into some mutual contract to betroth one of your younger sons to adina? hehe..kidding.. :P

mother and daughter on the first day of raya.
the complete family-to-be, insyaallah.

Anyway, sempena raya and to sum up 2005, i have some messages for...
my dear 4h: I've had an enjoyable journey with your class. As I taught you, I learned from u all too. You've filled my year with many heart-warming moments; moments which have permanently coloured my teaching life. I do wish to extend my forgiveness for things which i have said and done which could have inncurred your anger.Sometimes in our anger or frustration, we may say things that we don't mean.Teachers are humans too afterall. but rest assured,what i gave 2 the class came from the heart withe the best of intentions.Regardless of whether i follow u up or not, i hope u'll make me proud with your o lvl results. I have my eye on you guys. ;)
Some of my 4H heroes during a class singing competition.
4h during their raya visit.

my buddies and colleagues: you guys are the best.. whatever wil i do without u all by my side...:)
my dearest buddies
our future husbands-to-be.my man in white,era's in purpleand siti's in black.
the whole group.
my pillars of emotional and mental support in Dunman :)

d accident

2005-09-13T17:20:00.000+08:00

long tym since i updated huh.kaleidoscope went by successfully. teachers' day was fun. d holidays came n d holidays went by. but something happened which made it one that i wld not forget so easily. last sat nite , 10 sep, we went to mustaffa ctr to get adina's party bag stuff for her bday. still not wanting to go hm yet,decided to go for a drink at newton. my dear fiance' as usual never said no though it was already 11+.

Was happily talking away wif an and adina at the back was making up her own stories pretending to read. but the shock which came wen we were just abt to turn in to the newton carpark, didn't even have tym to register in my mind. in front of us was a huge ntuc delivery lorry heading towards our car. we cldn't swerve to the left as der were taxis lined along d road. d bang happened so fast n d next thing i know, adina was sreaming and crying n i quickly rushed out to get her but the door was jammed. d lorry had ran off n an had pulled adina to the front. she was bleeding n an's shirt was covered with her blood. some good samaritans had chased after d lorry driver. n pple had gathered ard. d ambulance was called n me and adina headed to KK hospital. Alhamdullillah, both adina n an was ok. when An had settled stuff with the police, he came down to KK.
When hesaw Adina,he hugged her n i saw his eyes all watery, i realised how lucky adina and i are. He said that when he saw the lorry, d first thing he thought of was adina.If anything has to happen, let it happen to him and not me or adina. Thank you Allah, for blessing me with such love.
Adina has got cuts on her legs, hands n one deeper one on top of her eyebrow coz the window broke and d glass shattered in her face. He has got a cut on his head. I'm ok. Just thankful that it could have been worse but it wasn't.I could have lost my daughter n with that my reason for living, but i didn't. I could have lost d man who treats my duaghter as if his blood flows in hers and who puts me ona pedestal with his selfless love, but Alhandullillah, I didn't. Thank you Allah.
So what if the car just came out of wrkshop for just 2 weeks. So what. I have something worth so much more than a 56K orange car. I have the people I love.

stressed! Kaleidoscope 2005

2005-08-18T22:08:00.000+08:00

AAARGHH!!! Kaleidoscope is this Saturday! Stress! 4 stacks of prelim paper to mark, 4 stacks of lit test waiting, 1 stack of eng class test waiting n some compo bks gathering cobwebs (haha...boy i'm good at exaggerating). Stress x3! Will the students fumble? Will the technical crew screw up? Will everything go well??? Thank God my team of drama n dance teachers r real dependable n i've got colleagues who go to the extend of selling the tickets in a totally unrelated bio lesson and some who even manage to convince their gullible class that they have been given the winning tickets for the lucky draw (because Ms Farah is their good friend). Haha...i sox2 love these people *Mmmmmuuuaaah!*
Awwhh! My 15 min computer break is up. Time to 'embrace' my red pen n face those prelim papers again. Grrr...n 4H, 4G, your compre paper sucks. And I thought 'Chalukkhan' was supposed to make the passage easier to understand. So much for him being a hero...

racial harmony day

2005-08-01T12:51:00.000+08:00

We had our racial harmony day celebrations last friday and it was fun, as usual, because there were no lessons to teach. hehe...
n Aiman finally returned my long overdue chicken soup book together with a huge bolster present in the form of a cross breed between a cow and a bee.+ a card..sweet huh... :)
my lovable and dearx2 4H... :)

Some of my heroes in 4H

matx2 S.Jibings from 5a

sakura

2005-07-24T22:42:00.000+08:00

had a great dinner at sakura interntnl buffet at dwntown east. adina got bullied by this boy n the mummy came to the rescue by threatening that probably 3 yr old boy that i'll get the policeman to come.haha..u shld hav seen how he quickly pointed the fingers at some other innocent looking girls. but apparently, the fright didn't last long coz adina soon came back telling me that that boy started throwing things at her again. so uncle shah went to d rescue but the boy was gone by then.
today i realised how bless my lil angel is. although her real dad is close to non-existence, she's got so many other mummies and daddies who love n dote on her just as much. her uncle shah had also taken for her ice-cream n took her the carousel downstairs which she had been eying. she came up holding a plastic bag with a barbie pouch inside n looking very guilty, twisting n turning the plastic bag. Shah had bought her a puoch n siti commented that she now looks alike to shah. kinda true. check out the male n female versions of the dressing.
adina n her uncle shah

when we were hm n on the way up d lift, she said," I like uncle shah." i asked her why n she said,"coz he love me n he kiss me n he buy for me things. i love him sox2 much." msged siti what adina said n she told me how blessed she was. she also told me dat shah said adina was very well brought up. coz when he asked her if she wanted anything, she said no. but after he insisted, she looked n chose carefully.
alhamdullillah... thank you God for giving me the strength to bring my daughter up as well as i could. thank you God for blessing me with a family who loves n supports me no matter how i have hurt them, with friends who have stuck through with me no matter how hard n tear-filled the journey n with a daughter who's given me the reason to live this life as well as i can in your path coz in her eyes i'm her hero, n i would never want to let her down.
me,tini n dat lil angel
effe n siti
effe, luqman n tini
me n tini all happy
don't they look similar. u'll be able to guess their profession with no help at all.
trying out the cikgu bedah look. hehe...fierce ah? hehe..

My 25th birthday

2005-07-24T14:12:00.000+08:00

Wow...I must say, this year was one of the most memorable birthdays i had ever celebrated. I'm still at a loss for words as to how to best put the experience in words.
Though 22nd July fell on Friday, a week before, i had already received my first birthday present in the form of a ring from my dearest fiance'. See? What did i tell u abt Mr Ring lover here. I have 3 more fingers on each hand to spare now.This time, it was a gold ring n though it looks like a misfit amidst the silver rings, I'm still wearing it proudly on my finger and it won't budge
i sox2 love ya!
Den on 21st july thursday morning, my dear Jeremy (5a) appeared in front of the staffrm door with a box of belgian chocs for me...awww...later dat day during lit period, my naughty but lovable 4g surprised me with a totallt unexpected birthday cake. They had all along been telling me not to absent myself (as i'm still very nasal and d cough is still bad)on the pretext that we had missed plenty of lessons due to oral.n i was actually feeling so thankful that these kids had 'woken' up and finally realized that its tym they got serious. I bet it was the best lit lesson for them. haha..:P but it was real sweet of them.
dat night, mummy dearest brought me out to eat and when the clock was nearing twelve, i received so many msgs to wish me happy birthday. Ariffins(5a) msg was real sweet. it went something like "Happy birthday to my derest teacher..." i thanked n told him i'm surprised he remembered. n his reply, "Of course! You're one of the best teachers I ever had..." awww...dat, coming from a boy who's rather aloof...i was just so touched. I asked Fahmi (5a) if arif has undergone some change or something. Fahmi's reply,"I think dat u had made a great impact when u first step in2 dis skl..Every1 dat u taught before remember u..Arip is 1 of them." aww...i was just melting...
Dalston called at 12 n wanted to sing me a bday song but my hp went dumb. i can't seem to hear a thing from the other party but they can hear me.
Come Friday, I had plenty of wishes from the students as i walked along the corridors in school. n when i went for 1E's lsn, they were suppose to have some surprise i think(though it didn't quite work). they were hiding in the next classroom. so when i stepped into their classrm, i had already ssen the illustrations on the booard which had stuff like 'Happy birtthday Ms Farah!No detention today etc etc'. Thus, i went to the next classrm to get them n i guess it was i who surprised them coz they just started getting out of their hiding places as they quietly walked back to class and wihsed me happy bday as they passed me. But when they were back in class, Math said, "Class stand! Class sing.." and they started singing a bday song for me..aww...
Den there were gifts from my dear colleagues who got me all those beaded stuff knowing my craze for them.
my beaded gifts
n the best birthday surprise(or not so surprising coz i already had on inkling of something fishy goin on) was from my dear 4H. Firdaus met me halfway through when i was making my way to class...my suspicions were already mounting as i noticed how he was not quite making sense with whatever he said. Den, i noticed the 4g onlookers who were somewhere outside my classrm just looking on n smiling as they watched Kai and Q and Ali fighting and dustpans n stuff getting thrown out in wat was suppose to be a dramatic fighting scene which would get me all panicky and running. I was just enjoying the treat n the only reason i quickened my step was coz i saw Kai grimacing in pain as he had really gottn hurt. but when i stepped in the classrm, my deearx2 students had switched off the lights and cleared the classrm to place two cakes on a table in the middle of the class. n the sand me a bday song. aww...for the umpteenth time..i was melting. as i had told them, i felt so appreciated and loved. it was all videotaped. n they gave me one of the best bday presents, a cute heart-shaped musical box with lil personalised notes from each of them. those lil love letters was what made it so special. if i could quote every note from them, i would...but with or without the quote, its been eternalised in my heart n memory. :)
the box filled with love..from my dear Sec 4h.
how it looks like from the front. n the mug from estee n Genevieve.
all the love notes and this one from adillah attached with a barbell (is that wat they call it?) she says, now i can pierce my tongue. like her. I'm not as crazy as u, my dear. :P

den came the gift from Estee and Genevieve (5a), a cute teacher mug.

Then Fahmi gave me a coin bank coz he couldn't find any better way to tell me to stop being such a spendthrift (like spending $250 to make my hair look like how it naturally is.grrr.. all thanks to that nyonya! but it makes me feel a teeny bit better to know dat my buddies are paying for part of it as a gift for me. :) )
all tired and make-upless but still posing wif gifts. here's the gift with a hint from fahmi.
n another sweet gift i got was frm Dan, Daryl and a few others from 5A. a gift box made up of smaller round concentric boxes and when i finally reached the smallest one n opened it up, there was a packet of hershey's and a note which said," Jus a lil something for our dear mum..May sec 4G(2004) be the lil choc pieces that enrich your life!" another one from Dan was "Happy birthday Mom! Thanks for everything u have done for us over the past yr. No matter where you are, I'm 100% sure that sec 4g will always have u in their hearts...happy birthday!" aww....such sweetness..there was another note (which i couldn't make out frm who) it was suppose to sound poetic i think but it didn't quite 'make it' but it is appreciated just the same. :)It said, "Even though we were together for just a year, we hold you close to our hearts coz u are our dearest. as we start to embark on our own journey, we hope you value this more than money.we just students, but we hold you up to the highest. This is from us, to you, our dearest." aww.... this makes up for all the past teachers day! hehe...

dis came with another huge pack of hershey's...mmmm....
my hp kept beeping with birthday greetings from my sisters, my frens and even an ex-schoolmate of mine (Mus) who never fails to forget my bday...gosh..i'm so touched.

When i came home n dat lil angel got up from sleep, she asked me for a hug and as she hugged, she said," Happy birthday mama" .dat love of mine, she remembered. i can cry...
if that wasn't enuf, dear lil sis wrote me a card and bought me chocs from choc world. her card made Adina cry coz as she puts it," Why Mak Su never give me card?". She was also asking, "Why Mama student never give me present?" I told her, "coz they don't really know u, sayang." n she said,"Next time i tell them that i am adina ok?" hehe...but she was the one having a gd time playing my musical box and my concentric circle boxes.
adina all mesmerized by the moving musical heart.

In the eve, Haziq (4J 2004)insisted on dropping by to pass me something. it was a card and a perlini's bracelet. so sweet..
a card from Melati (4h) and the perlini's bracelet from haziq

dat night, me, adina and my dear hubby-to-be, went to our usual hangout at east cst for dinner. :)
but that's not the end of it. on sat, at his place, An cooked for my favourite chilli crab and his sisters surprised me with gifts and a birthday cake yet again. so i celebrated my birthday with the 4th birthday cake together with his family. :)
n today..i'm going off to sakura for dinner with my buddies to celebrate my bday. again. hehe..wow...dis is sure a long and wordy entry but no words can capture the love and appreciation i feel from all those ard me.Thank you for all your love.

feeling so loved and so happy
a glance at just the gifts i brought home from school.

Dear God, I must have done something good in this life for you to have blessed me with such people and such love to fill my life. N i thank You for Your love oh God. Amin. :)

by the way...
pic from cross country..

Youth Day

2005-07-02T00:22:00.000+08:00

We had the youth day assembly concert just now or rather yesterday. As usual, we 'volunteered' to look stupid just for our students' viewing pleasure. So much so that I can safely call myself an annual professional fool(if there is such thing). Guess its all for the sake of the kids.:)

But I have to admit, it was fun and had been fun every year n is a definite de-stresser when you have just ended the day with a class among which, 38 out of 39 of them have waited till the very last day of the stimuli compo writing dateline without having produced anything. Having entered the class feeling like santa claus after giving away gifts(4 youth day this time) to other classes and waiting for that very last two periods to give them the painstakingly personalised gifts with love,just for them,the disappointment n anger was rather overwhelming. :(

If last year we were the lollipop girls, me n siti have now earned a new name which is not any better: Teletubbies. n as expected, my cheeky students were imitating us, bumming their tummies at each other. Hehe.:)

But hey, after all this rambling, i forgot. I'm STILL A YOUTH n i deserve a celebration as much as the students did. And that is why I'll be treating myself n Adina to an indulging session of ice-cream at Haagen Daz tomorrow.Actually, a McDonald's hot fudge sundae sounds even better! Woohoo! Hotfudge Sundae here I come!

p.s: Happy Youth Day to all youths and those who still feel youthful! *wink*

dance syf

2005-06-17T17:43:00.000+08:00

upon aiman's request: my dance students' posing for a pic b4 they went off for SYF comp last May. Am so proud of them. :) but apparently, d cameraman didn't quite like me. hehe.

still alive

2005-06-10T13:21:00.000+08:00

hmmm...been some time huh..ok..here i go..(after some whining and complaints from Anwar)..hmm...its d hols though not quite a holiday for me. not even getting out of Singapore. wanted to go 2 bangkok for some shopping but all my 'kaki-s' backed out.can't possibly go with just adina n me rite? actually, i can n don't mind but you noe lah,si pakcik satu tu mana kasi.
been down for one-to-one oral with my surrogate children n i AM REAL WORRIED. I see more than one potential Rong-Qiangs or Brandons n it so worries me. but one thing abt dis class of mine is, i feel more willing to go an extra mile when it comes to spending more time to work on their studies compared to last yr's 4g. n dats coz I see my 4H trying real hard n i feel real sad when i see that their efforts have not materialised. n this class, is somewhat more kiddish than my 4g last yr (maybe its just me who had matured. hehe) n i guess i automatically feel like a mum looking over some kids trapped n bodies of 16 yr olds. imagine seeing my boys sitting ard n playing a setx3 mix3 kind of game or shouting away some stupid chant to see how loud their voice can go, when u're just outside having an oral session.well..dats the boys. the girls are more to themselves...they say lil but they watch n judge. n if they're ok with u, u'll see em smiling when u try to crack some stupid remark (just to see their reaction) or u'll just see them being themselves,behaving the way they usually do their friends even though they know u're somewhr within close proximity and may just be having ur eye on them. they're typical maturing girls. but of course there are those who have a less than quiet nature n you hear them laughing out loud before you even see them. They're also the ones who give the class its cheery personality, a characteristic that make you look forward to seeing them. hey..why am i writing abt my class?!
well..back to ME. Went for d HI5 concert on 2nd June. dat lil pumpkin was so excited.several nights before, she told me, "Mama, kelly and kathleen all my friends you know. later when i go on stage to dance, you must follow me ok?" n after the concert, she was disappointed that she couldn't even get to take a photo with them or shake their hands. but the stuff they sold there was sure a rip-off. see the big huge hi5 hand u see in the pic? thats $10. n so is the ski cap thingy she is using. the balloon was also $10.yes, jus one balloon.but i refused to get anything which cost more than $10. yes, ten bucks was the minimum price of an item. all thanks to kelly, kathleen, nathan, charlie n tim.

waiting for it to start
adina dancing away
during th break
presenting..hi5!
kathleen's my favourite. the short one. hehe

car was in an accident. bad one. luckily he was ok. damage amounting to abt 20K. there was a chance of them replacing the car with a brand new one but.....the insurance company said, the engine is not damaged, so can't. :( grr... been car-less a few weeks now. have had to sacrifice our late night supper sessions :( but hey.. getting the rented-out car today! so butter prawns and calamari rings.. Here I come!!! :)

ding dong bell sick

2005-04-27T17:27:00.000+08:00

on mc today. thanks to a miss fadillah who passed me her ulcer(if it was possible. hehe), i not only contracted her ulcer but my ding dong bells or wat u wld call tonsils in medical terms, got infected n inflammed. to make it short, half of my throat is in bad condition and d shouting at 4H yesterday, on top of the chilli crab n black pepper prawn which my dear fiance' cooked 4 me (which i swallowed down blissfully, making me temporarily forget abt the pain), just made d poor ding dong bell worse.

well..why was i shouting at 4H yesterday? Let me just say, i re-lived my mad woman moments for a few minutes there after i realised that these kids were definitely not taking me seriously. hate to admit it but i think motherhood coupled with the heart-wrenching (yet beautiful) experience of teaching 4g last yr (or 5a dis yr) has made me a softie. yup, wen i blow my temper n my circuit fuses, i noe i make their balls shrink (if i could crudely put it dat way). No one wants to say a thing. but i hate the aftermath of a storm coz dats wen i get all softie wen it comes to PEP talks. masuk bab 'care n concern' je...abis.kalau lose control je...image ke mana, 'cool'nya ke mana. n all dis is coming from someone who once sneered wen she heard stories abt tchrs breaking dwn in class. ah tulah farhana.. takabbur lagi. hah amik kau!weak ah lu babe.tskx3...
but having said all dat, i recall the first day i met 4g 2004 or 3g back then.i wus a bit late n found myself standing outside 3g singing d national anthem. n when i wus standing der, i remebered those boys all excited n saying." Eh, chioubux2 ah." i bet it came from louis, dalston, andra & company.n those months followed with funny 'crush letters' n even student stalkers. It was flattering no doubt but as time went by, i realised that that was not d image i wished to uphold. My journey with 4G was a heart-wrenching one but as mastercard best puts it, it was priceless.I laughed with them, i screamed at them, i joked (n was also d joke), i nagged, i cried with them, i scolded them and i gave them detention like nobody's business(although i knew it would get me nothing close to appreciation but more of hate. basically, i did all d things unbecoming of a 'chioubu'. but it didn't bother me one bit. coz i knew that most importantly, i did one thing that i would never regret. I loved them.
I asked Dalston in feb this year how wus English n d new teacher. he replied that d teacher was funny, young n happening n fun (like me. haha!).i was glad to hear dat. but he said something which caught my ear. "But Ms Farah, u have something she doesn't.You've got heart."
Forget about being a chioubu coz now i have an even better title. a title which Eng Rong Qiang used to playfully call out, a title which Andra Ho faithfully calls me up till today even after he has left Dunman,: Mother.
It may sound old to many young teachers or silly to some others, but to me, though i've never told em this, its an honour.
so wen siti told me 2 weeks ago wen we conducted d napfa test for d kids n both of us were in charge of the shuttle run station,dat she found it funny seeing me going barefooted n running here n there n cheering for the kids with d stop watch in hand(as she sat glued to her seat taking down the timing from the stopwatch), a clashing contrast to the chioubu image of high heels and poised walks, i didn't feel bad at all. in fact, it actually felt good.coz i'ld cast my heels, my walk, i'ld cast all image aside (oklah, maybe not all. as long as i still look presentable. i'm vain n u all noe it. :P ),as long as i noe, i did it out of love.
n i'ld do it again for my students or who i would fondly call my children.n rite now, my fear, my concern n my worry is for those 39 children of mine in 4H.In fact,come to think of it, i really don't mind if they don't realise this.as long as i know that at d end of it,i have done my duty as a teacher n a surrogate mother, to see them thru d year, make it through the 'N's n hopefully through d 'O's too.Dat is all i ask for.
haha! i just realised that i could have been blowing my own horn for the last hundred lines or so. but hey, dis is my blog. my say. rite? just got to reflecting abt my career which in fact is so much more than just a career to me. call it a haphazard or a nuisance coz d emotional attachment dat comes wif the profession is something that i can't help either. but hey, dat haphazard put simply as love, is something i believe completes the whole definition of a teacher.

p.s: if any of my 4H students read this, read it. forget it.
Just remember,I'm still a chioubu, not a mother. hehe :P

hoped they were fooled

2005-03-22T23:09:00.000+08:00

*peekx2* any students there? hope i fooled them..hehe.. but i doubt so. bright teacher=bright kids. hehe :)
not been here for sometime.just plain lazy. sorry fadilah(student) for not havign linked u yet n sorry esra for wasting ur time checking unupdated blogs. oh yah, meet esra, my fellow blogger friend whom i just can't help but go on n on telling stories with. n she has been just as equally chatty as me. i like. :)
anyway, yesterday, i had one of those moments with adina. i wus asking her if she wants papa An as her father n she said yes. i asked her why.she said,"I like Papa. Nox2 I love Papa."
i asked further," Why u love Papa?"
initially, she gave me a lot of nonsensical answers but i told her,"Properly lah..why u love Papa?"
She said," Hmm... I love Papa because he make happy."
"Make who happy?"
n without hesitation she said," He make Mama n me happy"

at dat moment, i could only smile n thank Allah for his kurniaan.a priceless one.
i realised that even at dis lil age, one of the things that would matter to dis lil angel was for her mama to be happy.In fact, it was my happiness which she mentioned first before hers. i didn't see it coming from dat lil 3.5 yr old girl at all.it has been my daily doa which both of us will recite together since she learned how to speak. dat she become anak yang solehah, muslimah yang beriman n will always make Mama happy.I hope it will be truly be fulfilled. Insyaallah.
n at dat moment too, some of my recent uncertainties were laid to rest. An has given Adina n me much happiness. Dats wat matters. N insyaallah, dat much happiness n more, will go on even till the moment he leads me n my children to Jannah. Amin.

under d weather

2005-03-02T22:20:00.000+08:00

today's a wednesday. was absent from school yesterday n today. missed a lot of important periods today. feel horrible. both from d flu n from missing d lessons. :( d flu's not any better n i hope i don't pass them to my students wen i go back tmr coz their common test just nxt wk.
Dunman did well for d O levels but as expected, my dear principal was not very generous or quick with the thanking or show of gratitude. she just sent us a thk u e-mail 2day which was actually a by-d-way e-mail meant for other matters. we were in fact hoping for a half day or something coz the results was one of d best that Dunman had seen in many yrs n d teachers really worked their butts off last yr coz of previous yr's plunging results. on top of dat, last fri, we found out that dis yr's teacher's day celebration will be at one go in july with d youth day celebration. how 'appreciated' we really feel! dah lah last yr, we had no tchr's day celebration. this yr oso. n the following yrs to come too i suppose. dat one day wen we get thanked for our efforts n feel great to be a teacher, it has to be forgotten. n knowing d kids, they'll probably be too occupied wif youth day to bother much abt teacher's day. oh, wat a 'gratifying' career i have here.

Dugaan datang bergolek

2005-02-25T22:19:00.000+08:00

Jus came back from visiting An at d hospital. Yes, he's back der again. d right side of his head had been swollen for some time n he couldn't take d pain anymore. n he didn't even tell me abt it. Not about the swollen head, not abt going 2 d hospital. he told me he'll be working n most prob OT most probably 4 a stretch of 2 days. he must be crazy or something. finally, he confessed dat he's warded at d hospital. dat wus yesterday. 2day, i got angry wif him again coz he lied to the doc abt wat he was going thru. d doc asked if he had been waking up suddenly in d midst of his sleep. he said no (wen he had been experiencing dat several times already)n d doc replied," ah..good good.luckily not" of course i got angry. n he had also not been faithfully taking his medicine.like some lil kid or senile old grandpa scared of medicine, he actually threw them away. Gave him d very sad n disppointed look just now n he has promised to tell d doc d truth tmr. i hope he does. I'm worried. its's hard to convince myself dat he's just having severe migraine n i know he's scared too but he doesn't want me to know coz he doesn't want me 2b worried.He's always been like dat. no matter how bleak some situations were, he'll always say," jangan takut k. if u trust me, don't be scared. everything will be ok." n he has often told me," biar orang susah, jangan u." but tell me now, how can i not worry, how can i not fear, wen the person i love n wish to spend me life with n d person who has given his selfless love to me n adina is now faced with these possibilites of illness n death.

dat day, he had a dream. it was d day of our nikah. but he was alone n he was wearing everything serba putih. all white. no samping no nothing. just all white.

n now,he lied to d doc coz he wants to get out fast n get back to work to continue saving for our planned marriage. He's been falling sick coz of his head thing quite often nowadays.
Kita merancang. Tuhan menentukan. i don't know if im fooling myself, but i'm quite sure,as long as i still have him by my side n adina's,everything will be ok.

Ya Allah, berikanlah hambaMu ini kekuatan iman untuk melalui segala dugaan yang Engkau lemparkan kepadaku. Sesungguhnya terasa diriku tak termampu untuk melalui segalanya. Tetapi Engkau maha mengetahui ...dan aku redha dengan qada dan qadarMu...

brain dead

2005-02-23T16:10:00.000+08:00

lalalalalala...don't know what to do but so many things to do.....lalalalala.....40 books for compo to mark...39 books of journal writing to mark...another 39 of compo coming in tomorrow... another 40 of compre also tomorrow...lalalala...just done with 4 sets of lit class test..lalala...common test to finish setting...personal mastery plan to complete...lalala..staring at books now..eating preserved guava...lalalala..want to go back.. don't want to stay in school....teachers get brain dead too...........

My engagement

2005-02-19T23:55:00.000+08:00

Dear friends, today, I was officially engaged. woohoo! n even dat was a surprise. it was just supposed 2b a meminang thing and An jus said dat there was a surprise for me. n yes I was surprised coz I was dressed in this berlapuk baju kurung while his sis sarungkan d engagement cincin dat i didn't noe of. but its all a mix of sweet n bitter for me. i'm more fearful of wat d future holds. coz somehow,as d time draws closer, i'm often reminded of the tear filled nights i spent alone in my bedroom with only my unborn child for company, waiting to welcome a husband home,a husband who was gallavanting away with someone else but was on d pretext of having OT. Sigh....

but lets put dat aside. or at least, i will try to. here's a pic of the surprise ring. i wus telling An,in 5 or 10 yrs of marriage with him, one way to tell if his love has not waned would beto see the number of rings he has given me. by then, it should be enough to occupy all my fingers, probably a few of my toes too. coz d rings u see on my fingers are all from mr ring lover here. pics may not be dat clear.
d ring and how it wus presented. ni bunga dah layu coz been 3 days oredy. heh...

my engagement ring

comparing it with the other 2. of course i wear it on d other hand.D middle one was given on our 2nd date n it scared the hell out of me coz u don giv solitaires on a 2nd date. u don give rings on 2nd dates for that matter! but hey, i got it n now, i love it (n d person who gave it even more). :)
my cuz nikah. in d pic u see my 2 sisters n another cuz. n our kids of course. d lil girl in brown is just another niece. n not nurul's daughter.definitely!no longer sitting ard giggling but now its running ard after kids n making milk for them. soon we'll be sitting ard selling tupperware or avon stuff. eww!
pakcik mikhail not satisfied with one bunga mangga n wanting d whole stick
trying to perfect his manouver
adina feeling more cheerful after a sleep
adina's new room. d ok room.
d spooky master bedroom. look how dirty d walls were b4.

emotional drainage 2

2005-02-15T21:54:00.000+08:00

adding to the emotional drainage...My class has just successfully disappointed me for the first time today :( . need i remind u again that expectations should not be set too high? u'll just get burned the way 4G 2004 'burned' u out.

drained.....

2005-02-15T15:10:00.000+08:00

yes last week was a very short week and something i wish every week would be but unfortunately, the days seem to be sludging by. the house has not only financially costs me, but mentally, physically and emotionally too. some other 'things' have happened since d last time i wrote my blog entry. not just to An. Adina and me have been disturbed in our dreams (or shall i call it a short nightmare), my cousin's friend who came to help with the painting saw and smelled something when he was alone in the master bedroom n worse, i think it has followed An home. n i think wat Salha said is true, its residing in one of us. n i think 'it' is residing in An.

But the worst out of all of this disturbances is the emotional toil it has caused us. Somehow, since the house came along (n especially more so now) we've often not seen eye to eye. though we don't break out into arguments, its worse coz we just keep ourselves away from each other. actually its more of him. n i notice how it gets especially obvious and worse whenever we go to house.An notices the change in him too n how he's getting more hot headed. seems like a reversal of our usual roles (padan muka kau farhana :( ). you know how they say that a house with gangguan, rumah nya 'panas'. penghunix2 selalu bergaduh. i already feel it. i don't noe whether its coz we're getting more serious n heading towards marriage or wat. but whatever it is, i don't want my 2nd marriage to fail. not again.

n i can't help but feel so emotionally taxed. adina knows better coz after each prayer when i sit at the prayer mat and hold my hand up to Him, she'll be the one to sit beside me and ask "Mama, are you ok? Why are you getting sadder and sadder?", everytime she sees the tears falling. hehe. that lil angel. i still remember the first time she saw me crying when i tengah duduk berdoa.I was still in the midst of my doa when i heard lil sobs and when i finished and wiped my palms across my face, adina broke into uncontrollable sobs. Although i was still tearing, i couldn't help but smile.I asked her "darling why are you crying? Why are you sad" and dat lil angel said, "I sad because you sad" and she broke into her sobs again. *smiles*

Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku, kurniaanMu tak terhingga.Apakah aku termampu membalas kasih yang Engkau berikan pada hambaMu yang hina lagi dhaif ini?

reminiscing ol times

2005-01-31T13:19:00.000+08:00

went blog hopping last fri. 2 my students' blogs. kinda fun. felt like i was doin some undercover work or something. hehe. found one guilty fella who skipped school on 7th Jan to spend d day out wif frens (u noe who u r..), saw another side to many of them and most importantly, it got me reminiscing on ol times. the gigs and hanging out pacific plaza wif Vina and Fadly. the baggy pants and sitting around at mrt stations and mrt trains.d carefree days...though i do sometimes wish i could go back to those days, now, its a totally different phase already.its d angagemnet n marriage phase. of course, i'm somewhr beyond dat phase already. its d motherhood phase.but i want to make my re-entry into the marriage phase too!Just got news of era getting engaged dis feb on her bday (congrats gurl!so hapi for ya). Wonder when's mine...keep a look out for news my dear gal frens...

by the way.. my new house... someting spooky about it. nails and ayat kursi at the windows, limau puruts everywhr... n funnyx2 noises come maghrib. n An's hand got all swollen after he pulled out the nails from the windows. my dad made some air thing last nite. he's gonna go take a look at the place today. seems that the previous owner had pple who were not happy with her so they were sending over 'things' to her place. scaree.. they better stop sending soon..b4 i 'send' them a taste of my wrath..cheh.. mcm terror aje.. padahalx2.. heh *gives meek smile*

My new class

2005-01-25T21:38:00.000+08:00

Alhamdullillah, everything has gone fine. sorry to keep many of u un-updated but thank God, the brain scan turned out fine and he has been diagnosed with very severe and acute migraine. not as bad as we had thought. Our prayers had been answered. :)
hmm.. the new school term has started. My new class was not as bad as i had expected. In fact, i'm growing fond of them. :) i hope it stays that way n i believe it will. right now, i'm bogged dwon with marking n the flu thing is still lingering. having my second onset of fever, cough n cold n....yahoo! mc tomorrow!
going to hdb to collect my house keys! but the house looks real old n bare. just have to resist the temptation of going for renovation first. will be looking ard for my tenant soon... so.. anyone who knows of pple who wants to rent a flat????? :)

The new year

2005-01-02T13:43:00.000+08:00

pejam kelip pejam kelip.. dah pun 2005. wow...my dear darling is going to skl oredy and she is starting her first day on her mummy siti's bdy, 10th Jan.I'll be bringing my new video camera to film her on her first day. just hope i don't get scolded for unauthprized filming. hehe. but she has got rather clingy this hols so much so that she is not at all enthusiastic to go to 'Hijrah Indergarten'(in adina's words)

Next week will be a daunting week. Partly coz of being 'awarded' with yet another problematic class but more coz An will be going to the doc's for the result of his brain scan this Fri. He took his brain scan last thurs 30th Dec and was to follow up on his next apptmnt on the 17th Jan. but he got a call from the hospital on 31st Dec saying that they have arranged for an earlier appointment, 7th Jan. why? An is feeling all upset and so am i. I don't know how to console him coz all along i have been the one telling him that its nothing. It's not a tumour. It's not a clot. It's just very bad migraine. but i guess all along, i was trying to convince myself more than i was trying to convince him.

Gosh.. i feel overwhelmed. yes it's true, at first,I wasn't actually in love with this guy who had so sincerely accepted me and adina and gave so much of his time and effort and love to us. More than Zack ever did. But with time, I've learned to appreciate him and love him for all his sacrifices. He's the papa who showered adina with his love,made her milk when i was busy,carried her all the way when she was tired though his back ached and even as she grew heavier. He was the papa who taught her how to climb the stairs (hehe..i still remember) and the one who comforted her when she was scared when i wasn't around. and he was oso the one who scolded her ad corrected her behaviour when she did wrong. the strict one when i just couldn't bear to be fierce. in short, though she was never his flesh and blood,yet he loved her like his own.
and how he'll pamper me by cooking what i like when i go over his place on saturdays for his family gatherings. How he'll get himself out of bed to accompany me to send adina for her playgrp although he just came back from his 12 hour shift work. how he'll insist on sending me home even though he's down with fever. Or how he'll make sure my head and adina's is covered when we r caught in d rain but his is left exposed.Or how he'll travel all the way down from Jurong West to Bedok Reservoir on the mrt to send me food that he has cooked for me..or how he never raised his voice at me when we have misunderstandings but tolerate my phone slamming(hehe) and call me back again to patiently talk things out with me.. sigh.. so many good things i can say about him. this blog entry will go on and on if i continue.

i used to pray and ask God for a man who loves me more than i love him, loyal and loving and who is willing to sacrifice just abt anything for me. i just realised, my prayers have been answered. but funny how u have just got started to plan your life ahead with somebody and fate decides to throw u a challenge with such timely precision.
Hanya padaMu Ya Allahku berserah. Hanya padaMu Ya Rahim ku bermohon. Sesungguhnya aku redha dengan qada' dan qadarMu.

i'm alive

2004-12-20T11:51:00.000+08:00

hey people.. after so long.. i'm still alive .. hehe. looks like dis blog won't get any makeover anytime soon.. hehe. anyway, u guys can check out this year's syawal pics which i have added at the albums link. dis was coz of salha's request.so i gotta thank salha for bugging me to do something abt dis dormant blog. n check out my new hp! samsung e800. got it at $600 but after the buy, i realise, the features of the phone does not reflect the cost of the phone. no mp3.no video. :( but hey, i got it in my fav colour. hehe. pink. :)

my samsung e800

my pumpkin wanting 2b like mama
a sneak peek at syawal 2004 album. pic taken at fadillah's.

my tribute to Ramadhan

2004-11-08T20:55:00.000+08:00

As we approach the final league of Ramadhan, i can't help but feel sad to think i could have done a lot more to seize this once in a year opportunity. and as i reflect, i realise that with the years, Ramadhan holds an increasingly significant meaning to me while Syawal begins to pale in comparison. I remember how enthusiastic I was ( n i bet many of u, too) when i was younger, to know that raya was approaching near. Raya was a great time of happiness meeting up with cousins and friends and not to forget 'collection'. but now... i feel that its d beauty of Ramadhan dat accounts for d happiness in Syawal. n in fact, its d built up n d preparation to Syawal which makes Raya a happy occasion. coz even when i'm digging my pockets n purse for that last filled envelope raya to give so n so's kid, it will be d times when i go to nenek's house to buka n to help make d kuih raya, d terawih at home with adina tertonggekx2 trying to follow me but finally giving up by the 8th rakaat,d times when i go down to geylang in d heat of d afternoon sun with An profusely perspiring away as he carries the sleeping lil girl(who's not getting any lighter) through d human traffic, d planning n anticipation of mine, adina's and an's similar baju raya n of course breaking fast at An's place with all his family n the spread of dishes dat fill me up to vomiting point (nampak sangat my gelojoh.hehe)n the suppers or early sahurs with adina's mummies... it would be these very times which i would recall fondly and long to experience again more than Syawal, more than meeting friends and relatives n definitely much more than giving out green packets. As this beautiful month draws to a close, I thank Him for the chance He has given me to meet Ramadhan n i really hope that my life would be long enough to meet Ramadhan again. n to all my dear friends, my sis n anyone whom i know n is reading this, i extend my sincerest apology for any wrong dat i have done, zahir dan batin. May you have a blessed Ramadhan n a joy filled Syawal. Eid Mubarakh to all..

2004-10-13T09:11:00.000+08:00

Kak Sina,An's sis got married last Sat 9th Oct. Her 2nd marriage.n having shared similar worries and similar devastating 1st marriages, I do pray to God that thise 2nd marriage of hers wld go well. n so will mine. Insyaallah.

adina and her poser-kemoserness

us and d bride n groom

adina's playworks 1st review

2004-10-08T09:13:00.000+08:00

i just received adina's first personalised review for her first session at playworkz n i was so excited looking through the personalised pictures and all. no wonder dat lil muffins ran back into her class when she saw that i had come to fetch after the session.hehe. look how cute she is in her costume. :) *beaming proud mother's smile*

d synopsis of d lsn wic got cut out

adina in her dwarf costume

d task

d cradle for baby snow white

d 2nd task

putting d shapes together

will be going for the 2nd session today...wee! i'm just as excited as adina. hehe. n since i'm in a row (boasting or whatever u call it),i make it a habit to wish dat lil muffins gd nite n tell her i love her everytime before bed. n it'll be something like, "i love u more than my life or i love u more than d world or the universe or d stars n suns etc etc". so when she responded, with "i love you so much" i asked her further," u love more than the...?" n guess what dat lil darling said?(siti, effe n tini, i noe u already noe d answer but just play along :p) she said.."I love u more than my heart shapes n my triangles n circle etc etc" she started naming her toys n shapes but i guess dats those toys are some of d important things in a kids life. n for a 3 yr old kid to consciously know dat she loves u more than her toys.. awww.. i guess dats a huge surge of emotional fuel for me. :)

tai-long teacher

2004-10-07T13:22:00.000+08:00

If u ask me whats one of d next likely professions a teacher may consider as a career change, i'ld say: a tai-long. uhuh. ah-long. u noe, d one dat goes ard taunting $ from people. coz i sure feel like one right now. u noe how these kids love 2 supposedly have a sense of unity from creating their own unique t-shirts for CCA? Well, dats wat my eldds did exctly. n i didn't have any objections just dat i said dat since ey want it, i want them 2b responsible for it n take cahrge of d thing. take charge they did (almost) being responsible for it they didn't.i saw through d designining process n squabbles, liased with d man n at last let a student handle d rest of d matter. n wen i tot i've heard d last of it, d man calls me n says that we stil owe him $300+ even after d t-shirt has been delivered mths back.he's been trying to get my studnt but my student avoids his calls.so, i personally took charge of dis matter, took d list of names of students who have not paid n ran after each of d students, going class to class threatening dat if i don get d money by tmr mrng, they'll get hell from me on mon. n den i realised, (after blabbering all my frustrations out to salha) i sounded like an ah-long threatening to hang a pig's head and splashing the debtor's house door with pig blood.grrr... i guess these are some skills u pick up along with d profession.n wat's worse, after looking at d list, i realised dat those who have not paid up wld only account 4 abt $175 of d money we owe d man. dis means there is a surplus of $100+ unpaid n missing. dat student of mine who took charge (i will not mention names) is gonna get hell.oh yah he will. just he wait. i'm just so tempted to get a red can of spray paint, go over to his place n spray d walls with an ah-longs signage "OWE MONEY PAY MONEY!"
N on top of dat, i'll be embarking on another ah-long adventure as i have just found out dat my sec 2H has at least 15 library books missing from their class library n dis wld come up to abt $300 or more wic all of them will have to share d cost n pay.
So tell me now, isn't teaching d most well-rounded job?

retail therapy

2004-10-07T10:06:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was d day wen cikgux2s indulged in bohong sunats n went for a much deserved Robinson's warehouse sale. hehe. n as per normal,i will not fail to be an ardent supporter n contributer to S'pore's economic growth while selflessly sacrificing myself n d contents of my wallet. :)

d purple paus driver racing 2 spore expo for d best deals
img src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b4ce27b3127ccea85a3eece3830000001610">
Some of our treasures...

as usual, our students are not forgotten

Ms Nawal's bag of goodies

My driver home...sahabt sejatiku. hehe.. :0)

d 3 mummeis n their bday gift

2004-10-06T13:11:00.000+08:00

adina's 3 mummies, effe, siti n tini came last night 2 give their belated birthday gift 2 their much adored daughter. the gifts ame in 3 wrapped boxes n a rolled up poster.2 of these boxes contained dat kind of drawing board where almost everyone used to have during childhood. the type u can just swipe everything away in one swift movement. der was a big one and an identical mini one which she can bring along with her when we go out. Adina was real excited over this. well, come to think of it,Adina wasn't d only one. d 3 makciks who had deprived childhoods had their giant hands all over it in no time. hehe. (in fact, siti was also clearly expressing her great interest in adina's plate of dinner: rice with kicap n telur goreong. :p ) den der was a a box of C-Roms for learning (wic i lurve) and a Barney n mother-goose CD-ROM with songs n activities too. n lastly was d arabic poster or the alif-ba-ta poster. so sweet of them...dats just several more of the million reasons why these dear friends of mine make adina's great mummies. :)

Adina excited over unwrapping her gifts

tini trying to keep adina's hair out of her face (which is obvious d lil girl can't be bothered about

adina trying to figure out what her cd-roms are

Adina,her drawing board and her crooked smile

tini trying to correct her smile

d tua bangka at the corner, contented with her mini drawing board while d other 2 look on pathetically.

mummy effe's masterpiece (which i won't really deny)

Adina's masterpiece entitled 'When the sun meets the moon'.

something to inspire

2004-10-04T13:59:00.000+08:00

Something to remind us of the what we are worth to the people around us. Dan sesungguhnya Dia memberi dugaan pada hambax2 yang disayangi.

A well-known speaker started off his seminar
by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who
would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going
to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this.
He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, "Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
Well, he replied, "What if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground
and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it
because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives,
we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt
by the decisions we make and
the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or
what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased,
you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we
know,
but by WHO WE ARE.

Count your blessings, not your problems.
And remember: amateurs built the ark ...
professionals built the Titanic.
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.

adina's bday & visit frm d cousin...

2004-09-30T11:10:00.000+08:00

wow... its been ages it seems since i last wrote somtin. i actually even forgot the web address to access this page.well... some things have happened. like my princess's bday wic was celebrated at An's plc. she had two cakes. one elmo cake n a durian ice-cream cake.n i totally forgot to bring my camera. she had lotsa presents. like bags, barbie doll, toys and money. all from an n his family. real sweet of them. no gifts yet from my family. zilch. nil. grrr... greetings only. i guess its expected. my family has never been enthusiastic abt celebrating bdays n all.
anyway, d house dat i had wanted to get n oredy anganx2 so much abt... sigh.. i don think i'll be getting it. i am jus waiting for the valuation report to come out n d deal 2b negotiated when d phone rings and i get a call from my cousin who will soon be my neighbour if i decide to take d place. she strikes a conversation abt d house n all then, as i had expected, she asked to 'loan' her some money. though i didn't flatly refuse her, i did give her a much lesser amount. i am ready to halalkan dat money despite her telling me that she'll call to return d money back to me. so, jus imagine, if she has to walk past my place everytime to get to hers, how many other 'visits' i would get. sadly, i told my agent, i decided not to take d place. sigh... n i had everything planned oredy.but maybe, its a sign... so here i begin my search again... a search for a place, a place i can call MY own home.

D gift adina's papa An gave her. d huge gift i don dare open coz i noe everything in the box will end up everywhere in the house except for where it belongs.

D bags n d ballet shoes she got from An's sisters.
Sorry, no pic of the cake or the barbie doll or the dress she received.

Sad Monday

2004-09-06T16:35:00.000+08:00

Today is a sad Monday. My sad Monday & d weather seems to agree with me. I failed my driving with 36 accumulated points and feel real bad for all the people who have had to help me out with n lvl invigilation coz of dis stupid test. Nevertheless, i'll be attempting my 3rd test dis 2nd Oct but for now, i just want to nurse my wounded morale.
What's worse, Vina left for umrah last thurs and didn't inform me. didn't even noe she was going.Only found out abt it wen i read her mail. She didn't wan 2 trouble anyone. dreamt abt her last nite after i had read her mail. asked her to doakan dat i pass my driving but supposedly, in d dream, i spent my time tokin 2 her until i missed my driving test. guess dat cld hav been a sign. I sure hope she's doin fine in Mecca.guess i kinda miss dat mak nenek. sigh... :( my sadx2 monday....
Called one of my saviours who responded to my call of distress for food therapy. Tini and Siti follwed me to Gelare at East Coast to enjoy my mud-pie. :)
Forgot to add: On sunday,brought dat lil cupcake to an open house with programmes for the young. Playworkz (wic works a bit like tumble tots) and jitterbugs (she learned ballet and some dancing stuff).so cute. she was busy dancing away looking at herself in the mirror even wen the rest were dancing elsewhere. hehe.

adina dancing in her group

dancing away... (sorrylah gambar blur)

my mud pie

enjoying it with my darling

tini and her tutti frutti waffle

adina and her new friend who was so excited by her

Happy Teacher's Day to me!

2004-09-02T11:36:00.000+08:00

sigh.. what a horrible tchr's day. as usual, Dunman was record breaking when it comes to producing slave-like conditions. hehe. Our teacher's day celebrations was spent invigilating the common test, teaching and several of us sepnt our one day tchr's ay hols marking the CA papers that have started pouring in. no half day. no celebration. no nothin.{ other than the usual dinner at a hotel}
But there are 2 gifts i received which i loved. one was a brroch from 2E my lit class. somtin which was so me. a butterfly brroch with lil pink stones embedded. n the best one was one filled with much thought. It was a poem cum song written by one of my 4G kids, Farhan. He said he took 4 hrs to write it.n though it was only words written on a piece of foolscap paper, its very much appreciated. :)
Back to d dinner: Thank God I had great company for the dinner. I was near vomiting point already after the dinner that ended at about 11 p.m. & guess wat? Those makciks still wanted to go to Swensen's for dessert. n so we did. though i cld only manage 3 spoonfuls of ice-crm. Its not a wonder I'm turning into some kek lapis. :(

Adina & her 'I look like Mama' sunglasses

The photo of a photo from Effe's polaroid during our swensen's rendezvous.

The great company I had at Mandarin Hotel. Cool garden themed ballroom

The partners in suffering trying hard 2 hide d disappointment of teaching pathetic classes which equals to=lousy tchr's day gifts.But Salha doesn't seem 2b doin a gd job of suffering. Grrr.. Salha!U're a giveaway!

The cold dish which was d prelude 2 the mouth watering dishes we were served later

Showing off the rose tattoo we got to put on at d reception table.

still posing waiting for d event 2 start

After everything was over, these vain gals were still touching up 2 go 4 our desserts at swensens. Here, u see Ms Nawal posing, oblivious to the other vainpots.

posingx2 in d toilet, till d lights went off n we were d only ones left on lvl 35 of Mandarin Hotel

My vomit-inducing experience at Swensen's

My 2nd guinea pig

2004-08-24T14:57:00.000+08:00

One of my closest and dearest cousin got engaged last sunday. Her engagement was kind huge for an engagement. complete with all the tepak sirih n all. my sis and i came to a consensus dat it was more like a nikah. anyway, for the 2nd time, i've been 'invited' to work my artistic fingers and paint them beautiful (although d first time with my cousin Radiah, didn't turn out 2 well. hehe. but dat doesn't matter coz she's now a new mother again 2 her 2nd daughter.:) ) anyway, dis time ard, i tot i did quite well (it wasn't bad 4 an engagement make-up. not too thick or obit). well, u be the judge ok.
n d teachers in Dunman have just received a brand new acer laptop (almost all of us that is) n now, i've got 2 acer laptops. d bigger one i'll leave at skl n i'll bring mine back 4 home usage. all i need 2 do now is to get wireless broadband and i'll soon be a blogger fanatic. hehe. (jus a dream which can only be realised if i BURN these stacks of papers! *evil laughter* hahaha!)
got to key in remarks for my 4NA kids report bks pretty soon. n keying in remarks always saps the life out of me coz i put my heart n soul into coming up with unique and interesting remarks for each of these 43 monkeys. Sigh... apa nak buat.. cikgu mithali.hehehe...

My laptops

adina, farah & sarah bz at work in Dunman's staff lounge

their art pieces

adina's good friends

me & my guinea pig (in case u can't really c d make-up, my defense is dat its not meant 2b photography make-up.)

guinea pig 2-close up

Driving Jitters

2004-08-20T11:30:00.000+08:00

whoa.. don't know whther to be happy or scared. Went for driving yesterday and completed my module 2 (within 10 lsns! terror tak??? :) ). so i cld book my test date oredy. n guess what?! its just abt 2.5 weeks away. 6th sep. whoaaa... scaareee... if i do pass, it would be exactly 3 mths frm my first drving lsn with comfort.praying very hard dat i'll pass coz i wanna be driving ard for hari raya dis yr hopefully. Insyaallah. wish me luck!
back at hm, i made dat mak nenek try on 2 $5 dress i got for her at the JL sale. she loved the 2nd one better and when she was wearing it, she said," Dis one so pretty, i can get married oredy." hehe. so cute. n as usual, i asked her who she wanted to get married to. i guess u oredy know the answer don't you? come on.let's say it all together now... "i want to get married 2... MAMA!" hehe. she never fails to remind me how she's worth everything i went through (or even more, if i may add).Alhamdullillah. Sesungguhnya Dia maha Adil. :)

D ever therapeutic JL sale!!!

2004-08-19T12:34:00.000+08:00

Weeee!!! Did something mischievous yesterday. somtin which wld definitely land me in boiling soup with my 'kakak angkat'(a term of 'endearment' 4 my HOD) if she knew that the unexpected and urgent matter i had to attend to was none other than retail theraphy. but hey,it was definitely unexpected. and who's to say it wasn't urgent? 4 all u noe, if i didn't run off with Salha to mentally and emotionally energize myself yesterday, i would have ended up bordering on losing my sanity dreaming of floating compositions, atrocious handwriting and red pens all over. JL sale...you're my saviour...

I'm goin Bloggers over dis bLog!Arrrgh!

2004-08-18T13:14:00.000+08:00

Arrggh! So gerram.I left it in perfect condition yesterday and today when i checked, my rainbow text was missing and so were my shooting words in d status bar. spent so much time trying to rectify it but to not much avail. So thus, I leave my blog in this state of mess because I have many other piles of 'mess' I have to attend to as I would soon have to return them to their 'messed up' owners b4 i get in2 a mess. U understand dis messy mess? :(

.
goin bloggers...

'Family' night out

2004-08-16T10:23:00.000+08:00

went swimming last fri nite after a self-invite to Siti's (twiny) aquarius pool. :) It was the mums and the daughters swimmming a.k.a bonding/gossiping nite out by the pool. of course, half of the time, adina was hugging on to me and we were stuck in the baby pool for quite some time. den we moved on to the adult pool which adina has called the mama pool. n of course, it wouldn't be sah if we didn't go down the slide. all 5 of us, like some big babies. hehe. Siti lost one of her lens coz of adina's splashing( wic adina recalls with guilt. hehe. padan muka!) and after swimming, we had our bath, and sat on the swing outside talking away while the kids fed on nuggets,hot dogs and milo and played shoppingx2 all the way till 1a.m. me and adina had an exhausting but a great time. dat muffins kept saying she wanted to sleep at mummy siti house (& apologies to the original mummy siti. out of confusion to the common name 'siti', adina has also called her supposed Tante Siti, her mummy siti. Minta maaf ye. if its any consolation, she remembers u as mummy siti uncle shah. hehe) So... the fulfilling nite out had to have some upsetting element to it and as predited, it came in the form of my mother.
"Ajar anak balik sampai pukul 1 pagi! What are you trying to teach your daughter?!" well.. wats new. I have always been the target. but i'm very sure i'm not fabricating stories when i say there were several occasions too when my parents got carried away at their friend' s plc till late at night or even 1 a.m. while we kids occupied ourselves (especially during raya). Though i really don see anything wrong in that coz we were after all, still spending tym as a family, if i cld rewind tym,i'ld probably throw the same question back at her: What kind of values would she be teaching me then?

gROwing Up So Fast..

2004-08-12T15:44:00.000+08:00

This morning, my mum had an eye check up at CGH. n last night, b4 adina went to bed, I was talking toher about accompanying my mum to the hosp. and how she must be a gd girl and not be scared of the doctor. she went 2 out to kiss her apa and nani goodnight and guess what dat lil pumpkin told her grandma? These were her exact words "Nani don't scared of the doctor ok? I am here". Aww... dat cute bugger never fails to make me feel proud of her :)

2004-08-11T17:33:00.000+08:00

me n muffins

2004-08-11T14:15:00.000+08:00

With the gang(minus twiny who went for a kl trip)

2004-08-11T14:14:00.000+08:00

Finally, adina gets to see her pak bingx2.

Salha's Wedding

2004-08-11T14:05:00.000+08:00

My dear colleague Salha's big day.. gave her a last minute card which I was busy drawing and writing away when she was just a table away(with the occasional peeps to make sure she isn't looking). But who would have thought that she would pass by my table n see the bright red envelope with the huge name: SALHA, when I was busy zapping some last minute handouts for class.Hehe. It was a last-minute card definitely but what was written was something well-thought and written from the heart.& she (n her hubby)loved the gifts (especially the one that came in the red box with red flower petals generously thrown over it). :) Moga mahligaimu kekal ke syurga dear Salha!
n on the day itself, i managed 2 get adina out of bed real fast when i told her we were going 2 pak bingx2. n she told me "Adina also want to get married". When i asked her who she wanted to get married with, she said, "adina want to get married to mama." aww... wish it could be dat way. can't imagine d day i'ld have to let her go to marry someone who would have to take care of her for the rest of her life. He had better take care of her well. Or he has a mother's wrath to face..he ain't want 2 mess with that! But i guess, even though I can't get married to her literally, emotionally, I will always be 'married' to my dearest princess, from the moment i carried her in my womb till the day I will meet her in heaven. Insyaallah.

National Day Celebrations 2004

2004-08-11T13:41:00.000+08:00

Charlie & the Nin Jiom girls

2004-08-11T13:40:00.000+08:00

Some of d babes n hunks in Dunman

Back tracking- National Day

2004-08-11T13:34:00.000+08:00

We had our national day celebrations on the 6th of August and as per normal, we adorned ourselves in red and white. Wanting to look different, I wore my tudong (for the first time in school) ala rahimah rahim style. Of course I received comments, most of which didn't make me smile :p but hey, once in a while, its great to get out of the monotony. & up till now, I remain undaunted (by those comments)...>